3 things everyone should know about stalking
January is Stalking Awareness Month
Popular culture, like shows and movies, can make it seem like persistence is the key to winning someone over. However, persistence can quickly turn into discomfort or fear when it’s unwelcome. Here are a few things everyone should know about stalking.
1. Stalking can take many forms
Stalking can include a variety of tactics, both in person and online, of persistent unwanted behavior or contact, directed at a specific person, which causes that person to change their routine or feel afraid, threatened or in danger.
- Appropriate behaviors are: When someone says “no” and the other person respectfully leaves them alone and does not attempt to contact them again.
- Concerning behaviors are: When someone says “no” and the other person continues to contact them again and again.
Examples of stalking behaviors may include:
- Continually sending unwanted communications (including emails, texts, phone calls, handwritten notes, etc.).
- Contacting or using other people to get information about a person or to find them.
- Waiting for someone or showing up at places where they know the person will be such as their home, workplace or outside of classrooms.
- Watching or following someone from a distance or spying on someone with a listening device, camera, tracking device or GPS.
- Repeatedly leaving unwanted gifts, notes or other objects at a person’s residence, work, car or other location.
- Catfishing or friending someone through fake accounts (to harass or trick the person).
- Stealing or harming someone’s technological devices, schoolwork or other property, sentimental objects, people close to them or pets.
- Entering someone’s home, lab, office or car and doing things to let someone know they had been there.
- Hacking into someone’s social media, email or other accounts.
Here are some ways to identify appropriate and concerning behaviors that may prompt someone to seek additional help or support:/ova/difference-between-helpful-and-unhelpful-behaviors-relationships
2. Context is key
While stalking is often directed at a previous or current romantic partner, someone can also be stalked by roommates, friends, classmates, colleagues or someone they have never met or barely know, including matches on dating apps.
Gift giving, location tracking or sending multiple texts can be components of any relationship. It can feel really special for a roommate to bring a coffee just because they care or have friends checking an app to make sure someone got home safe. The key here is that these behaviors are wanted and help increase a sense of safety within the relationship instead of making someone feel untrusted or controlled.
From the outside, stalking may look innocuous, but to the person experiencing it, the behavior makes them feel unsafe or threatened. The context of the behavior and the impact it has on the recipient is what matters.
3.Help is available
It is worth noticing when someone else continues to contact you or your friend after they have been told “no” more than once.Consider sharing what is happening with someone else, or documenting dates and times of occurrences.
You do not have to resolve this on your own, especially when someone repeatedly shows up where they ought not be, makes indirect threats, or does not take “no” for an answer.Confidential advocates, law enforcement, and other professionals are here to help.
When someone makes direct threats or tries to harm or does harm another person or property,consider calling 911.
Stalking violatesCU’s campus policies and is considered a serious. CU Boulder provides a number of reporting and support options for those experiencing stalking.
Support resources for students, staff and faculty
If you or someone you know is experiencing stalking behaviors, it’s important to connect them with appropriate support resources and services.
General support
TheDon’t Ignore It website provides options for seeking confidential support on and off campus, skills for helping others and reporting options related to sexual misconduct, stalking, intimate partner abuse, harassment and discrimination, and if someone’s behavior is concerning.
Confidential support
Students, staff and faculty directly impacted by incidents like this, as well as witnesses and friends, can get confidential support and/or counseling through theOffice of Victim Assistance (OVA) by calling 303-492-8855, stopping by their drop-in hours (seewebsite for dates and times) or filling out a online. This form will only be reviewed by OVA staff—the university will not be notified, and no investigative action will take place. If you would like to get in contact with an OVA advocate counselor, be sure to include your contact information. OVA advocate counselors can help individuals explore their rights and options, make a safety plan, explore the impact of the experience, discuss reporting options, review living situations and more.
Informing the University
If you think you or a friend may be experiencing stalking, you can contact CU’sOffice of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC). OIEC can investigate concerns or address an incident through informal resolution options. Additionally, OIEC can provide safety and supportive measures, such as no contact orders, academic support remedies, housing adjustments and more. You can connect with OIEC by calling 303-492-2127, emailing oiec@colorado.edu or online.
Informing Law enforcement
Reporting to the police can take many forms and doesn’t have to lead to filing criminal charges. An informational or anonymous report is sometimes an option to make the police aware of the situation. Individuals may have the option to ask police to contact the person to give a verbal warning or press criminal charges. If stalking behaviors have occurred on campus, contact theCU Boulder Police Department. Otherwise, contact your local police department.